Slip Right Through Your Hands
by sadgaybby
Summary: Post series. After what seemed to be a fated reunion, Hyde and Jackie are forced to examine the state of their relationship after years of separate, personal growth. Some J/H and H/OC.
1. Chapter 1

_1982._

Honestly, the back and forth between the two of them tired Jackie out.

Three years had gone by since the fiasco of Donna and Eric's last attempt at marriage, three years of the group watching with bated breath as they danced around the subject of marriage or proposals. Nothing ever seemed fully set in stone, and it drove Jackie up the wall. Her dream wedding was a constant work in progress, just waiting for the right person to swoop in to take the role as groom. Donna didn't seem to have the same fervor, and Eric's flakiness and disinterest in planning only furthered her frustration. The dance was a tired one, and she was ready to be a goddamn maid of honor.

So when that cardstock made it into her hands, Jackie was understandably hesitant at first.

She got over it. She wasn't about to let Donna pick someone less giving and good-looking to be her maid of honor. No, this position had Jackie Burkhart's name BRANDED in it. It was going to be a good time and a memorable wedding. Even if it was in dumpy Point Place.

People who have never lived in the Midwest assume physically and culturally, it's all the same. There's trees, corn, and a lot of bars, but the subtly of moving past the state line from Illinois to Wisconsin is not lost on someone who lived their entire life in Wisconsin up till a few years ago. The energy seemed to shift, warmth and hospitality oozing from every pore. People still waved at you as you drove past, even in bigger cities. The sense of urgency is nonexistent, but tradition and pride are as integrated in its land as the pines in deep soil and the Kettle Moraine in the southeast farmland.

Chicago may have become her living space, but her soul felt at home in the Dairy State. She was grown, she had matured. This was a good chance to reflect but not fall back. Nostalgia was a beast she fought against lately, but Jackie was determined to not let it win.

Especially since it had been a while since she heard from Hyde.

* * *

There's beauty in the way you can learn details of a person. They way they push back their hair from their face, or the squinting they do before they begin to talk. Everything gets cataloged, even the small details you would never assume to be worthy of note.

Hyde catalogs everything. He always has, and he knows her face by heart now. It eats at him that he can tell what she's about to do next. Her eyebrows raise, and the arms cross. _Christ, he's going to get chewed out._

"You moved the store around again."

"If you keep it the same too long, people stop looking at new stuff, Ang. Basic retail knowledge."

"Don't you have something better to do, like paperwork or helping Forman with the wedding?" Her dark eyes seemed to stare past his aviators. It creeped him the hell out, how she managed to do it consistently. He mumbled out a response, choosing instead to focus on the last milk crate. "This isn't about Jackie, is it? I thought that was done with."

"It is, so drop it. The whole wedding things just has me stressed. I can't have a conversation with anyone that doesn't involve flowers or color schemes."

Even if Jackie was the source of stress, owning up to it would be worse. Life hadn't stood still for Hyde, and Angie had first handedly seen the changes through most of the past two years. Recently, she had been watching some girls come and go, nothing ever serious but enough to get her hopes up.

"What about Lulu?" He tensed at the mention of their part-timer. "She's got it bad for you, why not make her your plus one?"

"Because," he managed through gritted teeth, "I'm not gonna have some girl the gang doesn't know in every picture for Donna's wedding. She'd kill me. I'd kill me."

"Fair."

"No shit." There was a pause.

"You're hoping Jackie comes alone, though, right?" As soon as his ex's name left his sister's mouth again, there was a small yell as he headed to the back room.

* * *

Everything was chaos. A chaotic good, but chaos nonetheless. The family had ceased their teary congratulations, Kelso had knocked something over, and the newly married Mr. and Mrs. Forman-Pinciotti had begun their first dance. It was chaotic, and in the process of keeping everything together (as much as they could allow), Jackie had not spoken to Hyde besides a 'hello' at rehearsal yesterday.

Hyde had been trying for a good hour to make his way over to her, to say something, _anything_ , to save the awkward silence between them that would come. Anything to get his married friends off his back on the status of his relationship with her. Best man duties kept getting in his way, and maid of honor duties (bestowed upon Jackie of her own accord) kept her at bay as well.

Two hours in, he stepped over to her. The moment felt like it would hang in the air forever.

"Hey."

"Hyde, hey!" Fake surprise enveloped her voice. "Great job on your speech. It was really nice, even with you calling Eric a bunch of names."

"Yeah, thanks. Red seemed like he enjoyed it, so that's always good." His throat cleared, hands shoved in his pockets. Jackie noted his curls had seen a haircut recently, at least on the sides and back, giving him a sleeker look for his tux. _Oh, god, that tuxedo_. She'd seen him in a suit before, but true formalwear always defined a man. He wore it like it was meant to be apart of him.

Her own ensemble had not escaped him. Donna had opted for a non-puffy sleeved look (much to Jackie's fad-chasing chagrin), saving the petite girl from drowning in fabric. When _didn't_ Jackie look ethereal in formalwear? It was her natural state of being; class and elegance.

"So, you… wanna grab a drink? Open bar closes at five."

"...Sure."

* * *

Hyde was sure the bride and groom had figured out where they disappeared, but after emerging from the closet, hair disheveled and buttons hastily done up, he knew it would make its rounds what had happened. Their group of friends was notorious for gossiping among themselves.

It was the last thing he wanted. This wasn't supposed to happen today! It was not his time to be selfish and _needy_ , it was Donna and Eric's time to be adored and showered with attention, for him to crack stupid jokes at his guy friends' expense. Jackie should be in there, trash talking the other guests. It was the natural order of things.

Instead, he was now fixing his hair and his tie in the bathroom, Jackie surely doing her best to repair whatever damage he did to her makeup and hair. _This shouldn't have happened_ , echoed in his head. His glimmer of hope he had snuffed out years ago had come back, and it pissed him off.

The tail end of the reception was filled with drunken dancing, so no one really seemed to have missed the two. There was more beer, more dancing, laughter and reminiscing between Jackie and Hyde before the end of the night came.

"I'll call you, okay?" she said softly. Hands clutched the small of her back tighter, pulling her into a hug. "I promise. We can talk this out."

His words felt like they clung to the back of his throat, afraid of this vulnerability he was allowing her once more. A quick kiss to the top of her head, and he nodded.

"I'd like that."


	2. Chapter 2

_MARCH, 1985._

Jackie Burkhart had made it halfway through the 80s without major tragedy or disaster. Chicago loved her, daytime television loved her, and she loved _herself_. It was a feat she had always known she could manage, but actually realizing it was the best gift she could ever get.

Bob Pinciotti had managed to make it halfway through the 80s as well, his own personal triumph of new love and an upcoming wedding bringing Jackie up to Point Place again. He was practically her second dad, and the thought of him finding happiness in another person again gave her joy. Everyone had a someone floating in the world, meant just for them. She knew it deep down.

Unfortunately, she had yet to have her someone appear and sweep her off her feet.

Ever the romantic, Jackie hoped that this would be the time it would happen. Hyde would most certainly be there, and their lost chance could be saved one last time. Neither had spoken to the other in two years after their incident, the only information about one another being gained through the other members of the circle. She had assumed, for the most part, he had maintained his bachelorhood and focused on work. It was all Eric ever spoke of on the phone, how Grooves had acquired a space for local shows, or how he got trapped behind a tower of records for three hours. At some point, Steven had started renting his own apartment. Nothing seemed to change drastically, at least from the outside.

Was she an outsider now? Sometimes it felt that way. She lamented this to Fez and Kelso, who sympathized but never seemed to understand why she didn't visit. To them, all feelings of 'otherness' would disappear seeing familiar faces in a familiar home.

She hoped so.

Only a few miles from the Pinciotti residence, she had to muster up the courage to face her past actions. Of course, then she'd cry and apologize and hope forgiveness would follow. Maybe Donna could help her out. She seemed close to Hyde as of late.

Pulling up to the driveway, she noted the street was packed with cars, instantly recognizing Kelso's and Fez's. The El Camino was parked neatly in the Forman's driveway, spiking her heart rate up. _Crap._ She was hoping for at least a few hours before she'd have to talk to him.

Her thoughts dispersed, the sight of Donna, Eric and Bob brightening her face with a smile.

"There's my Jackie!" Still the same Bob, albeit a lot less of a perm. His arms enveloped Jackie's frame, giving a massive bear hug before letting her friends in for the kill.

"Christ, Jackie, how fast were you going? It took you way longer to get here last time," Donna kidded, giving her own hug. The brunette gave an equally enthusiastic hug, getting a chuckle out of the taller woman. "Kitty's dying to see you, she's been running around all day waiting for you to come."

"Really?" Jackie squealed. It stroked her ego to see so many people eager to spend time with her. "Okay, I've gotta put my stuff somewhere and give you guys the gifts I brought first. Mrs. Forman's going to _LOVE_ hers."

It was a whirlwind of clothes, bags, and careful coaching (her makeup case was her baby and Eric was somehow keen on mishandling it) before Jackie had settled in, pulling up her hair with a scrunchie and changing into something less professional. She was among family, and there was _obviously_ no need to put on the nines when she was already a ten.

The sliding door feels at home in her hand, the motion of opening it (not too hard, lest you break the screen) muscle memory at this point. An excited shriek comes from behind the counter, Kitty outstretching her arms. She's grayer, but seemingly still vibrant despite the years that had passed. Her unique laugh rattles in Jackie's ears, and she is home. She's home in Kitty's arms, in Red's remarks for Kitty to not start crying- _not that it stops her_ \- wrapped up in the smell of baked goods and light perfume.

"Oh, honey, we thought we'd never see you again!" Kitty's voice was a bit weepy, but still the smile remained plastered on her face. A pang of guilt rushed through Jackie, unable to do anything but hug her again. "Oh, you know what? Come have a cup of coffee with me, the kids are being put down for their nap upstairs, we have a minute."

 _Kids?_ She knew Betsy was here with Michael and Brooke, but she hadn't heard of another child in the group. Had Laurie popped one out? It wouldn't have surprised her. Last she had heard, Betsy was the only child within her inner circle, but they were at an age where children were a standard fixture in life for the well-adjusted beings of society.

"I'd love to Mrs. Forman, but, um, do you mind if I head to the basement? I just want to take it all in again," Jackie confessed. "It's all been a little overwhelming."

"Of course." A quieter version of her laugh came out. "You just let me know when we can sit and do that coffee."

* * *

The footsteps startled him a bit, bringing Hyde out of his haze. He had been sitting in his former room, feeling the familiar sensation of memories wrapping around him; nearly choking the air from his lungs. So much happened here, and it was hard to shake that. Hesitantly, he listened for the squeak of the couch springs and only stood after hearing a familiar sigh. Walking quietly out into the main room, a head of black hair met his gaze, stopping him in his tracks.

"Jackie…?"

She turned, startled, before jumping up and running over to him. He'd seen that look before, like a child at Christmas who prayed for a gift and received exactly that.

"Steven, I'm so sorry," she breathed, arms wrapping around his shoulders. Instinctively, he bent down to hug her back, breath hitching. "I've been waiting for the right time, but it-it just keeps getting away from me? I missed you. I missed you the entire time."

"I missed you too-" His words were cut off, lips crashing against his. Eyebrows crumpled in confusion, his entire being screaming to not kiss back, to not make this mistake.

He did. Passion lit deep in his core, hands placed gently on her face. _She's a witch_ , he thought wryly. _No one else has that type of power._

Jackie seemed to run with it, almost pushing him into his old room onto the cot, bent on quickly undoing the buckle on his jeans.

"Hey-Whoa, whoa! Jackie, this is not-"

"Shh," she whispered, biting down softly on her lip. "I'd rather it go like this than never being able to touch you again."

She didn't seem to expect the struggle. Even less expected was Hyde's face, no longer obscured by his sunglasses, screwing into frustration and disbelief. His hands grabbed hers, forcing them away from his lower half as he scooted farther up the cot. What felt like a mounting panic attack washed over him, unable for a few seconds to look in his former girlfriend's eyes.

"Look." His voice was low, husky but clearly rattled. "There's a lot that's changed, Jackie."

"I know, Steven, but we can make it _work_ -"

"No! It's beyond that, okay?! It's my fault for not trying to talk sooner about this stuff, but we need to have this conversation now, before someone gets hurt."

Slim legs folded under the brunette, her entire demeanor changing within seconds. For a moment, Hyde regretted his tone, knowing it would not help soften anything he would say to her. "Can you just let me do this once? Let me talk-"

The squeak of stairs made him jump, his eyes widening in panic at the sound of a female voice: "Hyde? Are you down here?"

" _-Shit_."

* * *

 **AN** : Do people still do these? It's been ages since I've written here. Anyway, I'd like to thank those who've shown support already, and hope that you enjoy the next chapter, whenever that update comes.  
 **Next chapter:** Hyde and Jackie discuss what's happened in the two years since their last reunion. People get angry.


	3. Chapter 3

Hyde's hands flew up, trying to fix his pants and belt as hastily as possible as a stream of curses fumbled out of his mouth. He hopped up, grabbing the still bewildered (and now slightly hurt) Jackie by her hand to meet the mystery voice in the main room.

The voice belonged to a young woman, a Latina, Paisley Underground type that seemed too comfortable in this basement for Jackie's liking. The petite woman's defenses went on high alert, sensing something here was not exactly right with her world.

"¿ _Quién es éste_?" The words melted like butter, Jackie quickly trying to translate in her head the basic of what she had said. High school Spanish had failed her, apparently.

"Ah," Hyde's voice seemed back to normal. He always had a way to slink back into his collected persona, never giving off cause for concern. "This is Jackie, actually."

"No way. I didn't recognize her, how dumb am I?" The woman's eyes widened, her lips forming a smile that released an embarrassed laugh. Her hand stuck out in an attempt to shake Jackie's hand, but quickly retracted when the other woman didn't reciprocate. "It's so good to finally meet you, Jackie. Hyde and I watch your show all the time."

"Wait, wh-"

"Yeah, he figured out we could get your morning show up here, so we watch it before he has to go to work."

Within the course of those few minutes, Jackie's heart fell to her stomach, then lurched up into her throat, threatening to pound straight through her skin. It was now abundantly clear who this new woman was. Brown eyes darted from this woman's face to Hyde, who had shifted over and was now rubbing the brown woman's shoulder with his thumb. He seemed to be avoiding both their eyes, unsure of what to say.

"It's always great to meet a fan!" she said brightly, eyes never truly deviating from Hyde's face. Her place in the world had been disrupted without her knowledge, and she was not going to let it slide so casually. "So cool you knew my name, since I have no clue what yours is."

"Oh, uh, Lupe." Bingo. She had hit a nerve, telling by the subtle shift in her stance and enthusiasm. "Or Lulu. It's fine either way."

"Oh, Lulu! You know," she started, arms folding while a smirk sat on her face, "Donna had said something about you like a year ago, but never really mentioned you again? Wonder why."

"Jackie, cut it out," Hyde warned.

"Maybe they thought you'd be gone by now." Part of her wanted to just apologize, but something not-so-deep-down got the best of her. The words kept spilling out, the defense mechanism doing more harm than good. She could already tell. Lupe's face had gone from shocked to eerily calm, waiting for the last blow so her storm could start. "I mean, you're basically just a cheap replacement of me."

"Hey!" Hyde's voice raised slightly, his defense obviously up now. "You don't get to-"

"Steven, stop." Lupe's tone was dangerously mellow. Her eyes finally raised back up to meet Jackie's, sending a shiver down her spine. "I don't know what your problem is, but it shouldn't be with me. Take it up with your friends, or, I don't know, Steven, who lied to my face about you knowing who I was."

She whipped her head to the side, this time glaring at Hyde, who seemed to wince slightly. "Did you tell her anything? Does she know about Toni?" He paused before trying to explain, only to be cut off again. A hand flew up to her face, rubbing her temples. "Oh my god, you didn't even tell her about your own daughter."

Jackie's stomach flipped. "You what?"

"Christ, I can't do this right now. I need a nap." Lupe gritted her teeth, pushing Hyde's arm off her. "I was actually excited to meet you, can you believe that?"

With the slam of the basement door, she was gone. Jackie watched the stairs, unsure of what to say or do besides glare daggers at Hyde.

* * *

It felt like he had gone deaf. The silence after Lupe's exit engulfed him, seizing his whole body in panic. Jackie wasn't saying anything- that would've been helpful a few minutes ago -and he didn't even know where to begin. Wordlessly, he sat himself on the couch, removing his aviators before burying his face in his hand. Jackie took a seat in lawn chair, obviously shocked.

"Why the hell did you say that to her?" It felt like he hadn't had a drink of water in ages. God, I need a beer.

"Excuse me? Why didn't you tell me you had a kid, you jackass?" she shot back, furious. "Did it seem like a great idea to have everyone lie to me? Because it fucking wasn't, Steven. Now I look like a complete idiot. YOU look like a complete idiot."

"I was trying to tell you that before she came down!" he yelled back. "You don't exactly answer when I call, so it was kind of impossible to tell you that way."

"What about Donna? You could've had her tell me! Or Michael? God, did everyone know?"

There was a pause. "Fez probably didn't for a while."

"But he still knew. Wow. What a great group of friends, huh?" Her voice started to waver, the tears threatening to break through. Hyde sighed, resigned, and motioned for her to come over. With a tremble, the brunette sat next to him, soon enveloped in his arms. The first sob was muffled by his shirt, but before long, they grew loud enough that his head felt like it would split apart. Hands brushed her stray hairs aside as he tried to soothe her.

"Jackie, I'm really sorry. Okay? All this is my fault."

She took a few seconds to gain some composure before looking at him, almost pleading. "You know how unimportant that makes me feel? You had this big milestone in your life and I didn't know about it. I don't even know when this happened!"

"She's going to be one in July." As soon as the words left his mouth, he regretted it. Fresh tears started to cascade, an almost inhuman wail leaving her. Christ, loud as ever.

"SHE'S ALMOST A YEAR OLD, STEVEN? Who puts off telling someone they had a baby for almost a YEAR?!"

"A dumbass?" he tried. She punched him in the shoulder, putting a small smile on his face.

The two sat in silence a while longer, the tension no longer palpable, but still hung in the air. If she had smiled, it meant he had done something right by her for the first time in a long time. God, if he could fix everything, he would, but it seemed like the smallest things were a gigantic task. First thing was first: fixing the rift between her and Lupe.

"You gotta apologize to her, Jackie," Hyde sighed, putting his sunglasses back on. "That stuff she said about being excited to meet you was true. She thinks you're a big time celebrity with the way everyone talks about you."

A snort came from beside him. "Yeah, second hour of the Chicago morning show, totally the big leagues."

"I mean, you're larger than life to her. She doesn't know the real you, she just sees you on tv and goes off all the stories we tell her." He paused, before his signature smirk planted itself on his face. "Well… I mean, now she's met the real you. Didn't think you had that cheerleader brand of bitch still hiding in there."

"Oh, it's evolved to a 'daytime talk show' type of bitch. Much more nuanced than the cheerleader kind." Another pause. "I know she's not my replacement. I mean, no one can replace the Jackie Burkhart, but I just… I don't know, Steven."

With a grunt, Hyde hoisted himself off the couch, meandering to the shelves by the record player. Jackie muttered something, questioning what he was doing. Quickly, he found the box he was looking for- one marked 'army men' -and plopped back down on the couch.

"You know how Forman has his Candyland cash?" he grinned. "Well, no one actually gives a shit about his old army men, so my hiding place is ten times better."

"What would you even have to hide, Steven?" Eyebrows were raised, unimpressed by this revelation.

"This." He fished out a small diamond ring, a twinkling stone bigger than the one Eric had picked for Donna, but not by much.

"Steven, you have a girlfriend and a baby. This isn't the time to have second thoughts!"

"You…" He stopped to collect himself, unable to process the utter stupidity that came out of her mouth. "No. It's for Lu."

"Well, good, because I would make you take that back and get something worthy of my ring finger." Hyde couldn't help but let out a chuckle, prompting Jackie to beam. She took the ring from him, inspecting it. "It is pretty, though."

"Thanks. I was sober the last few months trying to save up for that." His voice took a sour tone, recalling the excuses he made, saying the record store wasn't doing as well. Why else would he give up beer and weed for two months straight? He shuddered, making a mental note to grab a beer when this was all through. "I'm planning on popping the question after Bob's wedding is over. Give us all some time to come down from that party high, you know?"

He watched as she gazed at the ring a bit longer, cocking his eyebrow at her. The brunette seemed lost in her own thoughts, the sparkle drawing her further into her own brain. Finally, she handed it back- almost too gently -and gave him a big smile.

"Steven, I'm happy that you're happy. And if she's what does it for you, then that'll be okay with me. Eventually." It's the most sincere she's sounded all evening, making him genuinely smile.

"Cool." There's a beat, and before he knows it he's got her wrapped in his arms again. "Thanks, Jackie."

She was about to cry again, he could tell. Perhaps to preserve what was left of her pride, she opted not for words, but for a soft kiss on his cheek, hovering there a few moments before walking upstairs.


	4. Chapter 4

He knew he was in trouble the moment he reached the kitchen.

Kitty had Toni on her lap, bouncing the curly-headed baby on her knee as she sang to her. Toni was occupied by a pair of wooden spoons, waving them about without a care. Every so often, the spoon would hit the side of their breakfast table, causing his daughter to squeal in delight, babbling as if she were relaying some scientific discovery.

Hyde couldn't help but watch silently for a few minutes. Watching someone else's mother dote upon his daughter as if she were flesh and blood let a few pangs of loss seep through his usually guarded heart. Quickly, he reminded himself Edna and Bud had showed up to see Toni (two months late) only to drop off a small plastic toy and steal his beer. Fuck that. Kitty and Red had been nothing but supportive and full of tips for the new parents, some more helpful than others.

Which was exactly why he was in some sort of trouble. Kitty, no doubt, had talked to Lupe and took Toni downstairs to let her rest. She knew what had gone on in that basement, and he was about to get the 'I'm not mad, I'm just disappointed' talk coupled with sad eyes. Ugh. It was time for that beer.

As he opened the fridge as quietly as he could, grabbing a can, her voice rang out behind him. "Steven! Just in time, Toni woke up and everyone's slamming my doors!" Her laugh punctuated her report. Her eyes focused in on the beer in his hand. "Oh good, I need that. Trade you."

"But I… There's… Fine." Hyde's lips pursed slightly. If it meant a lighter scolding, he'd take it. He motioned quickly, letting Kitty take the beer as he felt the heft of a wiggling, babbling nine-month-old on his hip. "Lupe still taking a nap?"

"I think it's more like she's angrily staring at Laurie's ceiling or working on that Rubik's Cube again, but sure, she's taking a nap." Another nervous laugh rang out before she took a drink. "Oh, Jackie tried going up to talk to her, something about 'treating her fans right'? I told her to go practice on Donna before she went for Lulu, so, you're welcome."

"Thanks, Mrs. Forman." He was still eyeing up the fridge, tilting his head away as baby hands attempted to rob him of his sunglasses. "Sorry 'bout your doors."

"Oh, you know I'm not mad, just a bit disappointed. You can make it up to me later by cleaning the basement a little for me." Called it. At least the line had come without the sad puppy eyes.

"Sounds good to me." With that, Hyde maneuvered the fridge open, grabbing another beer before heading to the basement door with a wave. He turned his head to his daughter, putting on a very serious face. "Okay, punk, it's ten to eight, so we're right on time for the Cosbys. We'll do the dance, but only if you don't scream when Theo comes on. I know you've got it bad, but he's too old for you. Understand?"

He could hear Kitty trying to stifle a laugh as Toni squealed in agreement, bonking him on the head with one of her spoons.

* * *

The Cosby Show had come and gone, and so had most of the baby's excitement. She was playing by herself on the floor with a few of the Forman's old toys he had dug out of the mountain of boxes, looking up every so often at the tv with those deep blue eyes of hers.

The creaking of stairs mixed into the melody of the Cheers theme. Hyde turned his head slightly, acknowledging Lupe before he turned back. Wordlessly, she slipped into the seat next to him, laying her head against his chest. It was something he always enjoyed about her, her understanding that there was no need to fill the silence with useless chatter. The tv blared on, punctuated every so often by Toni's raspberries she was so fond of blowing lately. As much as he reveled in the silence, he knew he had to break it. Assuming things had blown over would be much worse.

"You still mad?"

"Mm…" Lupe looked up at him, crinkling her nose as she tried her best to look thoughtful over his question. The corners of her mouth teased a smile that wasn't yet ready to make a full appearance. "Yeah. Still mad."

He cracked a smile, slipping his arm around her. Lips brushed her forehead, gaze lingering as he played with a few strands of her brown hair. In that moment, an overwhelming thought occurred to him that he was lucky. This was not a life he had envisioned for himself ever, and yet he was living it.

"Hey, uh, I'm sorry," he offered. "I messed this up really bad and I just don't want you thinking I'm ashamed of either of you or something."

"I know you aren't," she answered quietly. "I don't really feel like hearing why you thought it was a good idea right now, okay? Just… it's something we can talk about tomorrow. It's late."

He grunted in agreement, leaning his head against hers. "We've got time."

* * *

At first, Jackie had been confused about Kitty's stern suggestion not to approach Lupe. it seemed like the correct thing to do, righting the wrongs she had done before anything got worse. Now, sitting on Donna's porch, she slowly understood that Kitty, per usual, was right.

The door clicked open. "What're you doing out here? I thought you were still at the Forman's."

Jackie cocked her head to take a good look at Donna, who had her easy-going smile plastered on her face. It almost made her more upset, looking at someone she considered a sister being in on such a huge secret.

"You know, I was until I met Lulu, who everyone I guess just forgot to tell me about."

Donna's face fell. Slowly, the door closed behind her, and she took a seat next to Jackie. "Hey, look Jackie, I didn't-"

"You didn't mean to be the worst friend in the world?" the brunette finished pointedly. "Because that's pretty much what you look like right now. You, and Eric, and Kelso, and Fez-"

"Look, I don't know about the guys, but I thought Hyde told you. He specifically said he called you and you didn't take the news well, so we shouldn't talk about Lulu or Toni at all." Her fingers rubbed her temples, trying to make sense of this. "I mean, either way, I talked about Lulu a lot on the phone with you after the wedding. I don't get how that didn't click."

Jackie's face creased into a frown. Now that she thought of it, there had been multiple times where Donna mentioned a girl named Lulu, but she assumed it was because the girl was a part-timer at Grooves. "Okay, fair, but you never said anything about her and Hyde being… together. You only said she was working for him."

"I guess?"

"So, when did she get a promotion, huh?" she sassed, leaning on the arm rest. "If it was right after the wedding, I'm going to kill Steven."

"Oh. OH." Donna's eyes widened, before she nodded absent-mindedly. "I think it was a month after the wedding? Something like that. Lulu's cousin is Hyde's dealer, so somehow they met and hit it off. I know they were spending a lot of time together before our wedding, and it definitely wasn't because of work."

"Oh, ew. Steven would not be above trading his body for another hit. It's like a bad after school special, Donna! We watched those together and he didn't learn!"

"Jackie!" Donna had to stifle a laugh. "It was kind of cute, actually. He was buying smaller bags so he could see her more often."

"What a goon."

"I know. The police caught on after a while, and they had to make up all these dumb excuses as to why she was at Grooves so often. Finally the dingbat just hired her."

"That's so stupid. He should've just asked her out," Jackie sighed. When had Steven ever done things head on, though? She could only imagine what a fool he made of himself the first time he and Lupe had spoken. The thought cheered her up; Steven Hyde losing his zen and becoming a babbling, embarrassing idiot sounded like a dream.

"Yeah, well, I'll let him or Lulu tell you the whole thing. It's a trip. I guess after the wedding, he tried talking to you but gave up and they started dating for real."

There was a silence, the two women lost in their own thoughts for a bit. It was thrilling, in a way, to know that she had pushed Steven's life in such a radical direction with her actions. She stood by her words; his happiness was, in some way, her happiness, but she'd still like to find her own whirlwind love story and rub it in his face.

"He wasn't going to stay single forever," Jackie finally said. "I just thought I had time, you know? These last few years have felt like a blur. Everything's going so fast."

"I totally get it. Eric and I have all eyes on us now for the baby thing, and it still feels like I just got married yesterday." There was another pause. "Being a grown-up is weird. Nothing happened how I wanted it to. But it all turned out pretty... okay. It's not all bad."

Jackie nodded in agreement. She let Donna's words hang in the air, contemplating them for a bit before realizing how late it was. "Shoot, we missed Cheers."

"It's cool, Eric will probably fill us in on that tomorrow."

"Yeah… Well, I need to turn in. I have exactly a week and a half to make Lulu like me again, so I need beauty sleep so I can start scheming tomorrow."

"Wait, what'd you do?" Donna's eyebrows raised, suddenly concerned again.

The tiny brunette was not going to dignify that with a response. She skipped over to the door, turning her head before walking inside. "Night, Donna!"

"Jackie, what'd you say?!"


	5. Chapter 5

Kitty had been more than willing to give Hyde's address to Jackie, seeming almost ecstatic that the tantrum that had occurred the previous night was over. Having her flit around the kitchen, piling food into a care package (or, an "I'm sorry" package, as she described it) gave some sense of normalcy to this whole situation. If there was something Jackie Burkhart could count on in this life, it was Kitty had comfort food and Red was hiding in the garage to avoid dealing with this mess.

Once laden with food and parked outside the apartment building, Jackie felt her nerves soar. Would she be turned away? Would there be more yelling? She couldn't guarantee her mouth wouldn't spill out more brain vomit. Tact and self-control when arguing had never been her forte.

It didn't matter. She was old enough now to be civil, dammit! This wasn't another Annette situation. Making peace and keeping her hometown a place of happiness was the goal here.

 _Here goes nothing._

A flight of stairs later, she knocked on the door.

No answer. She tried again, a bit harder. The door cracked open, the sound of a news show- _her news show!_ \- blaring, a baby crying, and Steven talking loudly about anarchy wafting into the hall. While a normal person may have walked away from the chaos, Jackie barged right in, finding a scene that matched its audio.

Lulu was frantically trying to clean some sort of milky, bile-like substance off the couch, the cushions strewn on the floor, covered in baking soda and surrounded by paper towel. Hyde, however, seemed to have the harder job of the two. He was crouched over, trying to wrestle a diaper on a very unhappy and unwilling baby.

"Oh, _gross_ ," Jackie blurted out in revulsion. The two adults froze and stared; Lulu serving her the 'How'd You Get In My House' look, while Hyde simply donned the 'Are You Kidding Me Right Now'. He turned back, ignoring her to continue his task.

"The door wasn't locked, was it." Lulu side-eyed Hyde, before cleaning up the pile of paper towels. "Uh, what brings you here, Jackie?"

"Well, I was going to sprinkle some excitement into your lives but apparently you've got enough to spare." Her face melted into a disgusted frown, setting down the paper bag of food offerings on their table. "Is this an everyday thing? Do you live like this all the time?"

"Sometimes there's more poop and screaming," Hyde replied, finally closing the diaper shut. Jackie caught a glimpse of his face, a look of confidence laced with utter exhaustion resting there. "Kind of like a nursing home."

"Double gross. You know how I feel about old people."

Lulu, who was rightfully wary still from the day before, was busying herself, tidying up the kitchen that looked like a tornado had swept through. She muttered a curse under her breath before turning and rushing to pick up Toni off the floor. "Steven, you're late. The store was supposed to open, like, ten minutes ago."

" _Crap_."

"Hey," Jackie started hesitantly. "I could… I could stay and help out for a while?"

It was starting to get weird, having two people stare at her like she was a Martian or something. The two of them turned to each other, whispering what she could only imagine was some sort of disagreement on letting her do housework or being around a baby, before Hyde stood up.

"I gotta go, either way," he shrugged, his voice smooth and calm. The clink of keys against one another joined the obnoxious jingle of the second hour block of morning news as he bent over, giving Lupe and Toni each a kiss on the head. "Don't destroy anything."

Now calmed and clean, Toni was now scooting around the living room in a baby walker as her mother and the new visitor (who was intriguing but not as interesting as Cheerios) scrubbed and dried dishes together. Music filled the silence, words seeming lost between the two women. Every so often, Jackie felt some sort of question bubble up in her throat, but it seemed to hang there, unable to worm its way out into the open. Lulu seemed to have the same problem, every now and then pausing her cleaning before resuming again.

It was almost torturous. The two had something in common, but it didn't seem right to speak about Steven yet. Not after what was said, what _wasn't_ said.

Finally, Lulu broke the silence. "I really appreciate the hand today, Jackie."

"Yeah, thanks for not making me wreck my manicure, though. It's got to last the week."

Lulu nodded, looking a bit amused. "Haven't had one of those in forever. I'm a little jealous."

"Your nails definitely look like they've seen better days," Jackie remarked, taking the other woman's brown hand in her own. "At least your cuticles aren't a complete mess."

"Hey, having a kid doesn't have to mean my hands have to look like Steven's."

The first genuine laugh since yesterday erupted from Jackie. "Oh my god, _right_? I'd try CONSTANTLY to get him to let me give him a basic mani/pedi and he always got grumpy and stomped off. There's nothing 'girly' about basic hygiene and nail maintenance."

"Seriously. I had to fight him on getting a haircut for Bob's wedding; I can't imagine what suggesting a manicure would do." Lulu swiped a few strands of hair from her face before taking her hand back from the petite newscaster. Meandering over to the baby, she hoisted her up in her arm before digging in one of the cupboards. "You want coffee or something? I need coffee right about now."

"Uh, sure."

Jackie felt slightly entranced, watching this woman she barely knew weave around a kitchen, completely at home with a baby- _god, the kid had his curls and his eyes_ -on her hip and a stranger at her table. Would this have been her life, had things worked out as they should have back then?

 _Would that be me here if I had just picked up the phone, Steven?_

The clatter of coffee mugs on the fake wood brought Jackie out of her deep thoughts, watching again as Lulu settled Toni into her high chair and poured fresh coffee from a carafe for the two of them. The radio still blared filling another silence between them. Silence, something that never fit Jackie at all, but seemed to be a shawl she draped over her today.

"Look, I'm sorry about yesterday," she started, rubbing her thumb against the smooth porcelain. "I was out of line."

"It's okay. It's Steven's fault anyway."

"So, do… you want to see pictures?" Lulu asked, leaning forward on the rickety table. "I mean, we can watch tv or something but I figure it's a good way to get to know each other. I'm sure you've got dirt on Steven I can use."

Jackie laughed through her nose, an incredulous smile on her face. "What, you're going to blackmail him or something?"

"Hey, I'm not above amoral methods to get a few new outfits out of him." The mug made its way to Lulu's mouth, which was curved in a mischievous smile. "I don't know, Steven doesn't talk much about high school. Eric and Donna aren't exactly the most reliable storytellers, either."

It took everything for Jackie not to shoot back that Steven hated high school; that his life had changed so much during that time, that her existence in his life was so engulfing during those years that if Lulu heard him speak about it, she'd know Steven Hyde would never be over Jackie Burkhart.

She didn't say any of it. Honestly, she was pretty proud.

"Well… I guess break out the photos!" Jackie smiled as best she could. Lulu grinned back, flitting in and out of what Jackie assumed was their bedroom- _Steven shared a bed with this woman_ -to put a small album on the table.

Jackie flipped it open, unprompted. Staring back at her was an army of tiny Steven Hydes, most annoyed or obviously too baked to care that a photo was being taken. Her favorites quickly became the ones where he was unaware of the picture being taken. Those captured what was so unequivocally him that it made her heart jump in her throat.

"You took all these?" she asked, feeling like her voice was detached from her being. She flipped the page. It was more of Steven, but this time littered with the faces of Leo, Angie, and Lulu.

"Yeah, most of them were when I first started at Grooves. He would get all embarrassed. It was real cute."

Another page flip. This one was almost completely Lulu, obviously taken by someone who hadn't handled a camera as much as the subject of the photo had. Her eyes gravitated to a scene of the woman leaning against a turquoise Oldsmobile Convertible, a caramel vision of curves, smoke, and florals. It was candid, but captured exactly what it needed to.

"He took that one," Lulu spoke up. "He said it reminded him of the first time he saw me and wanted to make sure he had it so he wouldn't forget I used to be pretty once I got old. Dork."

A few more flips through, various photos of them with their extended friend group or Lulu's friends, and she hit what she was looking for. Cold hospital beds, and Steven looking more scared and tired than she had ever seen before.

"Why is Toni in an incubator?" she asked absentmindedly.

There was a pause. "She was a month and a few weeks early. Needed a respirator since her lungs weren't working well yet. Scariest three weeks of my life."

"Sorry to hear. At least she's… doing well now?" Jackie couldn't help but squint at the baby next to her, a mess of curls and fruit stains. Something so wrong had happened to a person he loved, and Steven hadn't reached out to her? _I'm a damn good listener, why wouldn't he...?_

"Yeah. A freaking terror." Lulu was back to smiling. "Daddy's little anarchist."

"I'm tellin' you man, she's a freaking terror. Won't sit still, throws things at me when I tell her no; she's an anarchist in the making."

"She's a baby, Hyde. They throw tantrums and don't listen. That's, like… what they're supposed to do," Eric answered dryly from the listening pit, flipping through the newest Rolling Stone.

"Well, she made me late this morning, and if that isn't a first step to stickin' it to The Man, I don't know what is," he answered, plopping down on the seat next to his best friend.

"Yeah, Eric, you don't know how radical kids can be," Kelso chimed in, his head bobbing in agreement, mouth going slack after finishing his sentence. Unopened beers occupied both his hands for a moment before he passed one on to the lankier of his two friends. "Betsy's got a thing for coloring on the walls now and it drives Brooke _nuts_. I think she does it just to make her mad sometimes!"

"That's… again," Eric started, squinting at Kelso as he opened the beer, "what kids do… right? They drive you crazy."

"Whatever man, you don't understand 'cause you don't have 'em," Hyde offered, scooting over to make room for Kelso.

"I don't think I _want_ them," piped up Fez. His mouth fell into a line, disgusted by the baby talk. "Hyde, I thought you said we were doing a Circle. Kids don't belong in the Circle!"

Hyde waved him off, nonchalant as usual. He produced a few "supplies" and within a minute, had lit up the joint and passed it off to Eric. It made its round, untill the four were laughing like old times, talking nonsense. It was a miracle the car hadn't come up yet, but Hyde reckoned he wasn't that toasted yet.

"I gotta say though, it sucks sometimes," Kelso murmured after a while, coming back to his original thoughts. "You know, I used to get laid like three times a day. And now? I'm lucky if it's once a day."

"Shut up," Hyde retorted. "At least Brooke's putting out on the daily. I'm lucky if Lu's up for it a few times a iweek/i."

"Guys-" Fez tried to interject.

"It's all the diapers! If Brooke wasn't changin' 'em so much, she'd have way more energy."

"Speak for yourself, man. I pull my weight with diapers. It doesn't help."

"OKAY. Noooo more dad talk. I'm putting my foot down." Eric's voice cracked a little as he spoke up, arms signaling an 'X' as his face mirrored his distaste and disbelief of the subject matter. "We are baby-free, dad-free, diaper-free for the next hour, and if either of you say anything, I'm kickin' you out."

Hyde scoffed in disbelief. "This is censorship. You know, we have a right to protest and overthrow dudes like you who try to censor our thoughts and discussions."

"No. Dad. Talk. Now pass me the joint."

Hyde's grumpiness hung in the air with the smoke, letting a few seconds pass before the joint moved on.


End file.
